Her Heart

It lies out in the dirt
Been run over, walked over, crushed over
Bit by bit losing its original shape and form
No longer pumping warm blood
But a cold dark liquid frozen
On the empty street
Soon it will heal on its own
Every time it does.
To be pampered again,
Tickled by tender touch
Fooled by false promises
And then when least expected,
Once again,
To be crushed

The Lavatory

One drop, two drops
Another makes it three
The monitor screen blurring
And that’s the final warning; the red flag
Flood walls cannot hold any longer.
The four walls of the lavatory
Made of concrete
Yet so sentimental, melt
Like an iceberg at the Equator
Not once, nor twice but
Every time her barriers wear thin
And the tears gush out
Into the pale wash basin
Like the monsoon floods,
Listen to her silent weeping
Absorbing her pain
Into its thick plaster
To be concealed from the world
Until the lachrymal have dried out
Till the next time…..

Being a Vegetable

Yes, I haven’t written in a long time

What can I write?

When all thoughts are gone

When all words are lost

Without a trace

Into the thin air

I just stare

At the moving figures on my tv set

Do they make any sense?

Highly doubt it

Does it matter?

Have no clue

Should I do something about it?

Can’t be bothered

So yes, I haven’t written in a long time.

The Man in the Dark

You stand in the shadows

The melancholy well covered by the darkness the light brings

The tears locked in the lachrymals, the key thrown away.

Your enormous heart beating in silence

Your enormous heart that once beat so loud and strong

Your enormous heart, no one could see nor feel

Oh those unlucky ones, who couldn’t see the worthy of you

Let them carry their darkness with them,

Let them rejoice the mistakes they made.

In a second a heart breaks, to mend forever it takes.

But let no pain poison your heart

For it is a jewel of the rarest kind.

You and I

Two strangers meet at the Pacific of misery.
The tide is high
The wind too strong
A single soul against the surge is like,
An autumn leaf about to fall.
They make a deal with words unspoken
Mending two hearts scarred and broken
A sail weaved with two souls instead of one
Creating more thrust against the wind of change
Wrestling against the tidal waves of pain
Finally arriving at the shore of peace and happiness
One on the East and the other on the West

We were fated to meet but never destined to be….together.

Wasting Time

You know me, I know you

But we pretend, not to know

So let’s chase our thoughts around the block

Shovel our feelings into a little black box

Scream louder than the voices in our heads

Till we both can agree, that it’s just too late

A Housewife's Daily Chronicle

5.00 a.m.
The alarm starts screaming,
Finally silenced by my hammering
Cursing I drag my feet from Dreamland to Reality
Make a gallon of morning bed tea
Spend the next fifteen minutes at the little one’s bed
Trying to wake him up from his fairy-dreamed slumber
Taking a break every 4 minutes to shout at top of my lungs
To get the two lazy teenagers out of their beds.
It’s the same medicine for the man of the house.
As they brush, wash, comb and dress
I chop, simmer, boil, mix and stir
While being the location navigator
For missing socks, hair pins, ties and shoes.

One by one they leave the house
It's like the Monsoon came to an end....till the afternoon
I let myself fall onto on the porch,
Pour myself a cup of coffee
And sip slowly while the mind makes strategic plans
For the rest of the day
Piled up laundry, cleaning and sweeping                                                                                                       
Lunch : bake, roast, grill, steam, fry
Dinner: Settle for take away
An overdose of favors,
From ironing the next days’ clothes to helping with homework
As the list of chores goes sky rocketing
I switch to Martini Ross.

The clock hands do their Salsa and time flies at light speed
Finally the Sun sets and the day close in.
Time for my one minute meditation,
While taking the night shower
Slowly I crawl into the bed
With every muscle in my body screaming for a good night sleep
Alas, my man has not fallen asleep yet
He looks at me the way he did on our honeymoon
and murmurs in a husky voice
I look at him matter-of-factly
Oh no Honey, not tonight.

Untitled

Used,

Played,

Insulted,

Lied to,

Finally thrown away.

And all I did was, love.

The Rose

A dazzling rose in full bloom

With her petals glowing with the warmth of the sun rays

Permeating hundreds of miles with her fragrance

Dancing in the wind enjoying its solitude

Until it’s time for it to be cut from the stem

To be wrapped in polythene,

Sold at the local market

Suffocate to a lonely death………………

Stolen Moments

I lay helplessly on the lonely road, blood gushing out
From where the mugger’s sharp blade left a deep wide hole.
As my life drains second by second
And my spirit leaves the body bit by bit,
Angel of Death appears before me to strike one last bargain.
I need to give him the happiest moments of my life
And in turn he will give me more time on earth
A few seconds from here and a few minutes from there
Can make up a few more hours of my life
Till some stranger finds me and call 911.
The more I give, the more I would receive
But my life will not be the same
With those memories gone, my past altered,
The future, a complete darkness.
But then, what’s the single thing in life that comes risk-free?

As the pool of blood widens, as the pain intensifies
The desire to live grows from every vein, every nerve, every muscle
He is asking for the day when I as a 12-year-old, got my Labrador,
The time that I passed my driving test and my parents gifted me the old volkswagen
The day of my graduation, my first book publication,
The time I spent with the best of my friends
That moment I saw Her for the first time,
Every second we spent together; making love, making war, then making up.
The moment when I proposed to her and she said ‘Yes’
My first son’s birth, his first step, his first tooth, his first word
Then the arrival of the second son and his “first”s.

I barely manage to whisper a No.

The Purpose of Life

The purpose in this life can be more readily understood when you catch your life's vision.

Life’s vision is arrived at through visioning. Visioning is a function of the intuitive mind where you tap into your soul and "see" your future by sitting in the silence of meditation and allowing yourself to dissolve into the beyond of the conscious mind and see your life and how it unfolds for the highest peak of goodness. This gives your life a reference point to determine if you are on-track.

It is said that this vision is the "internal picturing" of your purpose unfolding the reason why you exist. When you create a life plan or blueprint for your life part of the plan must be to vision your life. However my belief is that there is no reason for existence but existence itself is the reason. And this is the purpose of life.

It is quite common for people to question the reason for their existence. However what they do not realize is that Existence does not need a reason, but it is actually the reason for everything else. Everything revolves around existence. As once a good friend of mine said, it is the same as asking "What is the purpose of Life?" The simple answer to that age old question is "To Live." It doesn't get any simpler, or any more complicated than that. For someone to truly understand and practice the best way to live, is something that can take an entire lifetime.
“Living” is not just merely being. People seize to live even when they are still breathing, working, eating and engaging in their usual day-to-day activities. This happens to the majority of us.

“They did everything automatically, oblivious to the magic moment that each day brings with it, never stopping to think about the miracle of life, never understanding that the next minute could be their last on the face of this planet” (Coelho, 2005: The Zahir)

The purpose of life is to live and this means enjoying every second spent, listening to the rain drops outside the window, smelling the roses on the way and even getting pricked by thorns in the meantime and pulling them out and learning how not to get pricked by them in the future. This requires personal development and growth. Without it, it is unlikely you will achieve your own true potential.

“To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it” - Mother Teresa

My vision for life is to Live and let live. It is to be remembered when I'm gone from this life for enjoying every day I was blessed with, impacting every person that I had the pleasure of meeting in a positive way, inspiring them to dare to make their work be something that is truly enjoyable and meaningful to them and helping them to understand who they are and how easy it is to become who they'd like to be while helping myself to do the same. I want to be loved - especially by my family - but by as many as possible, and to be able to come to love them as well. I'd like for people to tell tales of the times that we spent together for many years after I'm gone. That will be the true measure of value of my time on this earth, or whether I was just successful at avoiding death for a long time. When I leave this earth, my tombstone shall read “She died while she was alive” (as said in Zahir by Paulo Coelho).

So......What’s your vision for life?

Teenage Love

You smile, your brown eyes twinkling
My mind you have been reading
My heart melts like ice cream at the sight of you
I hear there is space in the galaxy train for two
Let's run away to our paradise
We have eternity till the Sunrise
Walk on clouds, eating pop corn on the way
Bathe in the moonlight chasing our sorrows away
Dance to the songs that angels sing,
As you slowly kiss my strawberry lips.
My bubble pops with the ringing of the bell
And my day dream comes to an abrupt end.
I touch my hair to find some gold glitter
Could it be star dust from our trip to the other sphere?

Liberation

I saw a dead man today
Lying on the pavement
Blood spattered across his face
Invisible to the world while alive
Has now become the center of attraction
With the audience sighing of an untimely death
Cursing of an inhumane act
Admiring a man who had worked hard
To provide bread and butter
To the little ones at home
Is it only me who sees the peace behind the emptiness in his eyes?
The joy of liberation from suffering
But I wonder how many times he would have to return to this material world
Before he can really be free.............

Walk Away

I am not afraid of the growling sky or the darkening clouds
But I fear the droplets escaping her eyes
My shabby old umbrella is no longer strong enough to shield me
As they come down under gravity force
With more power amassing on the way
Accelerating at a rocket speed
A storm looms not far ahead.................
But I still open the same old umbrella
Knowing it is of no use
As the rain shred the umbrella and sting me
Spreading the pain all over my body
I realize it is time to let go of the defenses
Deception cannot last forever
Alas I deserve what befalls me
So I draw back the umbrella and let the rain fall on me
And walk away
Never to return..................

Hopeless Dream

Just an ordinary man
that's what I thought of you
at our first acquaintance.
Another mystery waiting to be solved
I realized along the way.
As I seem to unveil your mask
I let you steal my precious heart
and now I drown in the pool of despair
with water running above my head
tying myself from expressing my feelings
for I know I am invisible to you
covered by the layer of friendship
and blocked by the pretty faces around you.
So I wait with the hopeless dream,
when the fallacious angels are gone
you will see me.....................

Waiting.......

His heart beat echoes in the silent corridor

As he walks back and forth

His feet trembling even if he convinces himself they don't

Anxiety fills his eyes but hope deeply stings in his heart

He is numb to the drama around him

And curses the clock for the hundredth time

Finally the metal door opens

And the white cloak approaches him

His heart best accelerates with each step she makes

"Congratuldations! It's a baby girl"

At last he releases the breath he held for so long

As a warm smile blooms across his face

His feet take him to his little angel

who has come down from heaven

to call him 'daddy'....

A Plea

I stare at the far horizon drawing fuzzy sketches on the sand

that the waves erase in just a moment

Oh you ruthless mighty sea, erasing my sketches

just the way you erased my dreams.

Oh the brutal murderer of innocent joy and laughter

Don't you feel ashamed of you cowardly act?

Are you not guilty of the crime you committed?

Oh you cold blooded killer, how could you steal him away from me?

If your deep dark water was instead like a bride's veil

I would see where he rest in peace.

Oh mighty water lord, bring him back to the shore just once

so I could tell him the three words

I never had the chance to say....................

Darkness

In the heart of darkness I lay
White space remains on the walls
where your pictures used to be
And a black hole in my heart,
The silence in the house is deafening
and the cold digs deep to my bones
as life drains from my soul

Then I hear her laughter
The sweet aroma of scented candles
escaping from the opened windows of her home
Whilst your favourite dishes getting ready in the kitchen
It's a pity that she had to take the light of my life
to brighten up hers

In the heart of darkness I lay………

Life

He stands
at the edge of the earth
The gushing wind
filling his ears
One more step
will end his suffering
forever…………….

As the dark clouds
steal the golden Sun
With the wind screaming
its mournful song
He falls…………..

Through the dark storm
a hand reached out
HER hand reached out
Finally his fingers touched hers
Their hands firmed in a clasp
As the wind cleared
the dark clouds
As the Sun turned into
a golden disk
He smiled………

At last,
An end to his pain……
A new beginning…….
Eternal peace……

Stillness Speaks....

You sit and gaze
at the constant movement
Everyone rushing past you
all rats in the never ending race
Mesmerized in their sugar coated dreams
The clock is ticking
Spring turns to Summer
and Summer turns to Fall
with Winter not far ahead
Life goes oninside the maze
and you wonder if anyone understands that
Stillness speaks